As every second passes change is happening. Some people do not realize that as each second passes it will never exist again and has gone into the past. In one-second change has happened. However, many of my clients feel stuck and some feel stagnant in their lives as they hold onto a sense of comfort, security or safety. They are experiencing Kainolophobia or Kainophobia- Fear of anything new.
Even though some people are aware of the need to make a change, they just can’t quite take the step and do it. Some types of change that only happens to you can be scary. Often it is so completely out of your control with no time to prepare for an adjustment and then acceptance. The actual changes that you make such as moving, job hunting, marriage, divorce, are in your control. The changes that are thrust upon you produces fear and anxiety.
Decisions, picking and choosing can produce a fear of making a mistake. Fear of picking the wrong thing thereby you are not able to take action. The fear of success or failure can thwart you because you do not know what will be asked of you by the change that occurs.
● Reduce your fear by allowing yourself to be uncertain, unknowing and accepting the ambiguities in your life that happen from time to time.
● “What if” thinking is irrational because the “what ifs” have not happened. Generally, the worst that can happen is receiving a “no.” The feeling of rejection is very scary to many people. Even thinking about successful possibilities and outcomes are anxiety producing. Thinking about your ability to handle your success can cause great anxiety.
● Begin using small incremental thoughts toward accepting change versus hanging on to old ideas of security.
● Start with little bits of risk taking because excitement can feel like it is a close cousin to fear. Let your enthusiasm be a motivation within your own life’s possibilities and choices as new passions start to sprout.
There Are 5 Things We Cannot Change
And the Happiness We find by Embracing Them. ― David Richo
- Everything changes and ends.
- Things do not always go according to plan.
- Life is not always fair.
- People are not loving and loyal all the time.
- Pain is a part of life.
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustified, terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”
—- FDR – First Inaugural Address, March 4, 1933